Giving your spouse the bad news: you want the divorce

 

Usually, people do not file for divorce out of the blue. They think about this possibility a long period before making the final decision. However, acting behind your partner’s back is definitely a sign of disregard and cowardice. Even if the last years were filled with discord and frustration, you did spend a big part of your life next to your husband or wife meaning that you owe at least minimum respect and consideration. Being honest is the best way of approaching this topic with your partner. Of course, nobody said that handling such a conversation is easy, but it is necessary, especially if you raised your children together. You need to think about their well-being and maintain a positive relationship with your future ex spouse. First, make sure that you really want the separation. Have you spoken with a close friend, a family member or even a therapist? Has your love for your husband or wide fade away? Have you spoken to a Las Vegas divorce attorney about the divorce procedure and financial implications?

You should anticipate the reaction of your spouse

If the answer to all the questions mentioned above is “yes”, then telling your spouse about your final decision is the only and probably the most difficult thing left. If your partner already sensed your alienation caused by the lack of communication and intimacy, then it should not be a shock your desire of filling for divorce. However, if you did into give him or her obvious signs before deciding to take this major step, then you should expect a surprised reaction followed by a rollercoaster of feelings. Even though during the conversation you need to remain calm and be direct, you can still express your feelings of anxiety and fear. After all, just because you are the one who brought up the subject, it does not mean that the idea of getting a divorce does not affect you just as much. In fact, the emotional and financial implications of this type of procedure affect all the parties involved. Since this represents your first discussion about the topic, make sure that you do not tackle all the details. Otherwise, it will become too painful for the both of you. Furthermore, give your spouse the needed time to process the information.

Make sure that nobody else witnesses your conversation

Do not waste time creating a plan before approaching your partner. Just be honest and open about your thoughts and feelings in what concerns the evolution of your relationship. Of course, choosing the right time and place to deliver the bad news is important because you do not want anyone else present in the area. This represents a problem that only involves two parties, namely you and your partner. Allowing someone else to intervene between you would be a terrible mistake because it will simply worsen the situation. Once again, if you have kids, do not let them witness your discussion because it might get too heated. One of you or even both might start crying and it should be an emotional private moment.

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